It’s Elementary, My Dear

Friends! How many of us have them?

I’ve recently decided to online date again (waits for applause). It has truly been something. If you are like me, it is a whole new experience and completely foreign. There are many tips out there for success, but one that I keep hearing is stalking their social media. 

I have never been one to do that and honestly hate the idea of playing Inspector Gadget, trynna solve a crime and figure out who is who. 

Introducing my bestie! She is a Social Media Sherlock. She notices things I don’t and is able to put it all together to give me a thorough report.  

Me: Found his gram I need u to do what u do

Bestie: On it

Me: Loved “On it”

Bestie: Likes alcohol Lol

Me: Any sign of females, kids, uselessness? 

Bestie: Lots of thirst, nobody seems to have an important spot.. He’s an uncle. No sign of his own kids…Loves his mama 

Me: oh gosh 

Bestie: Thinks he’s cool for sure.. He looks miiiighty short my friend

Me: profile said 6 foot

Liked “Loves his mama ”

Laughed at “Thinks he’s cool for sure”

Bestie: If he’s 6 foot his homies are giants…Very family oriented. Nobody’s veiled 

Me: Liked “Very family oriented. Nobody’s veiled ”

Bestie: Not super active on IG…But when he posts there’s always a few bi@#hes commenting…He has a female best friend, which I think is a plus

Me: oh gosh…r they cute? ur so good at this…I would pay for your services…luckily I know the wine you like 

Liked “He has a female best friend, which I think us a plus”

Bestie: They’re skinny…Lol

Me: oh gosh…🙄

Bestie: In a no good way. And he doesn’t respond to them AT ALL

Me: regretting those cookies for breakfast …😒

Bestie: In fact, his bestie got in one post and was like “look at all these comments, stay woke”…They’re not all skinny but all are sloppy

So no serious chick

Dude I would do this for free for any woman! It’s hilarious 

Me: Questioned “In fact, his bestie got in one post and was like “look at all these comments, stay woke””

Laughed at “They’re not all skinny but all are sloppy”

Liked “So no serious chick”

Laughed at “Dude I would do this for free for any woman! It’s hilarious ”

“stay woke” meaning what?

Bestie: Bc the girls were like “you look like the guy from get out” and “you look like a jazz musician”… Basically being thirsty and she’s like don’t buy it

Me: hahahaha he looks like neither…they trrriiiieeeeeddddd it

Bestie: He does appear taller on fb

Me: Laughed at “He does appear taller on fb”

Bestie: He’s posting pics of other people’s weddings, showing goals for 2020 as marriage etc

Me:😂 Oh gosh..so damaged goods?

Bestie: Ugh he’s a Capricorn…They are the best

Me: Best for what?

Bestie: I mean. He appears to be a little bit of a play boy but wants a relationship. There are signs of evolution

Me: is that good for me?

Bestie: Just logical thinkers, open communicators 

I’m concerned that there are no signs of a previous relationship 

My question would be has he ever HAD a serious relationship??!!

Me: I deleted all of mine so I get it 

He told me it didn’t work out and was very vague bout y

was specific with mine tho so idk

Bestie: He’s a bit conceited…Like attention seeking

Me: that has potential for annoyance… seems more like insecurity

Bestie: Conceited is the wrong word. Attention seeking and validation seeking is better

So there you have it….… what about your friends? Will they stand their ground? Will they let you down? Will they social media stalk your potential love interest? Maybe they won’t if you are capable, but if you aren’t then make sure you keep a “Sherlock” on your team.

Let Your Inspector Gadget Light Shine!

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