Ten days ago, on December 5th, I turned 33.
33 isn’t a birthday that is traditionally marked but there is something special about it for me. Jesus was 33 when HE was crucified, hence, “My Jesus Year”. The significance for me runs pretty deep. Both non-believers and believers choose this year of their life to be a year of change, fulfillment, reflection, purpose, etc. I’m not quite sure what it is for me, but it’s only been about 2 weeks and I’m questioning EVERYTHING!
Typically on my birthday, I share things I’ve learned in general or about myself on social media. The number of things I share corresponds to my age. I did it for 31, 32, and now 33!
1. Weighted blankets are UNDEFEATED
2. Support can be given and received in different ways, be flexible AND understanding
3. Even if you get on the SNKRS app 15 mins early, and end up in line within a minute…it does NOT matter. Take ur “L” and be going. FYI…the raffles aren’t any better.
4. Godly men wear Yeezys, Jordan 1s, AND tell each other that they love them (shoutout to Rob, Vern, & their Pastors)
5. When your siblings are confused about why their child is behaving a certain type of way…play along. Don’t tell them you let them have and eat whatever they wanted ALL day.
6. I’ve NEVER dated a man who wasn’t African. As much as I love Nigerian men, I haven’t had the best experiences with them. In fact all of my experiences with them have been horrible. This isn’t implying that ALL African and/or Nigerian men are bad. I was so stuck on what I considered the perfect guy for me. Part of that included someone who not only understood my culture, but was an active participant. It’s time to be open minded.
7. I can be really moody
8. My tummy is mad sensitive. Honestly, it’s gotten to the point where I know exactly when I’m going to vomit and it doesn’t phase me. I’ve decided to see a gastroenterologist FINALLY, well hopefully
9. I’m afraid to admit and acknowledge my fears. *IRONY*
10. Zero Carb bread from Aldi is a game changer
11. If you are sure pregnancy is not a possibility and you’re period is late, pop a couple iron pills and/or Vitamin C. It will most likely help Mama Flo show up for her monthly visit.
12. Lavender in the shower is BETTER than eucalyptus in the shower
13. Trader Joe’s is my fave
14. Getting groceries delivered is the standard, no more Aunt Jackie holding up the line cuz she has exact change. Between instacart and amazon, I’m all the way set.
15. Men find my lips sexy and it’s hard for me to believe cuz I was bullied constantly for them when I was younger. They said my bottom lip was like the guy off of Nutty Professor…LMBO! Kids can be so mean, but real talk that is mad funny
16. No matter who he is, if he’s wearing grey sweat pants I’m looking
17. My thoughtfulness and generosity is unmatched. I had to make peace with this and adjust expectations.
18. Men need reassurance too and won’t ask for it the majority of the time. If you don’t give it to them they will seek it in unhealthy ways from another woman/women who give it freely
19. No matter how late I am…I’m going to stop for coffee…doesn’t matter if it’s work, church, appt, etc
20. You can give it to GOD and go to therapy. One doesn’t negate the other. It’s crazy cuz we def take our meds and pray for healing. Most draw a harsh line with therapists that they don’t with doctors. I understand it completely, I just don’t agree.
21. There are moments when I’m confronted with my loneliness. The silent space of what should be filled with a partner can be so loud. It doesn’t happen often, but it does happen…(efff you for real COVID, u a whole b@#ch) Before COVID-19 life was busy and full in a distracting way. Now I’m kind of forced to acknowledge and process what I feel and how I think about things. It’s an intersting journey.
22. Singleness is not a punishment or a curse, I’ve come to a peaceful reconciliation within myself about this. Live ur life shawty becuase one day you will look back and miss these days.
23. I plan out my hairstyles like I’m meal prepping…..Dec – Weave, Jan – Box Braids, Feb – Natural Styles/Rest, Mar – Bob w/Bayang, etc.
24. I have an unhealthy attachment to my car named Favor. We’ve been together so long. I legit do not know what I’m going to do when I have to get a new car.
25. When I get a flat stomach I’m going to misbehave in the most thorough way so everyone should prepare themselves accordingly
26. Natural pads are the real MVP (my suggestions are Honeypot, Naked, Jewel, and Femly) Periods haven’t been the same since I switched from Always…I’m never going back bruh
27. Emotional eating may or may not have morphed into emotional spending (Retail Therapy) I’m not sure tbh
28. Ghosting is such trash behavior but it’s my fave unhealthy way of coping… I’ve gotten MUCH better over the years but boy o boy I miss “clocking out” HEAVY
29. It is possible to have high self esteem and low self worth
30. I’ve come to a place where I not only desire BUT demand to be loved and liked out loud…anything less, miss me
31. I don’t NEED anything else. The excess is becoming a problem. Crazy that the WANT to make up for past years of lack even exists. I realize not having many options as a kid has made me want several options as an adult…But then again maybe a few more pairs of pumps and purses won’t hurt
32. My knees have turned into Rice Krispie treats…they will snap, crackle, and pop as they see fit
33. I give gifts as an expression of my appreciation, love, favor, etc. I’m not the best at verbally or physically expressing these things but I’m learning. Funny thing is when I receive gifts I’m grateful but I honestly prefer quality time and words of affirmation.
Well Sunshine, there you have it. 33 things I’ve learned, my little nuggets of wisdom. Hopefully this blessed you in some way, encouraged you, or at the very least, made you laugh. Just know, every single word is true.
Let Your Jesus Year Light Shine!